We, millennials, live in two worlds, one that didn’t need the Internet to fall in love and one that requires it. We’re not the like the gen x, who are raised on technology; we grew up as it was being developed.

Speaking about love, many of us, millennials, are struggling to define courtship. We’re so misunderstood by society-at-large because we even haven’t decided what we want. We then try different things, things that other generations might see it odd and new, just to figure out which ones work best.

Tinder comes as one of the solutions for millennials dating. It is about meeting new people for many kinds of reasons, like dating, relationships, friends or even traveling. Tinder allows you to meet people outside your closed circle. It is for people who would never encounter in the places or circles they normally interact.

These days, Tinder is mostly associated with the hook-up culture. It is a fact that many people are still trying to hide or deny. However, this phenomenon has created a growing sentiment amongst elders, traditionalists and social commentators, saying that romance has been replaced by casual sex and hook-ups; that today’s youth doesn’t understand what love means.

I’ve come across the term ‘Tinder generation’ quite a lot these days. Tinder is no longer a new app for most millennials. This dating app has shifted the way millennials date and sees relationships.

The tinder generation, a generation of openness

The millennials habit of oversharing on social media opens up the freedom to discuss all of our concerns, thought and obsessions with dating and relationships, no matter how unusual or potentially embarrassing.

Millennials today are not afraid to express their feeling about someone on social media, through silly quotes or song lyrics.

Scroll through your feed or the explore section of Instagram, you’ll find posts on how a relationship should be, how a tinder chat goes wrong or some stupid texts from exes.  

It makes you realise that you’re not the only one who experienced those stupid and funny dating moments. And, it feels good to discover that you can relate to many people out there.

The act of openness on social media creates what people called as ‘an ideal relationship’. Lately, the hash tag #relationshipsgoal is trending on Instagram. People are so obsessed with relationships and seeing happy couples online.

However, as much as millennials share things online, many still don’t trust it to find love. This is where the casual dating comes into place.

The casual dating

Being ghosted or ghosting someone is no longer strange. I bet you’ve experienced it at least once. It is just a part of casual dating.

Today, millennials live in a culture where there could always be someone else out there so the idea of getting attached to anyone doesn’t sound appealing. What if someone else better is out there?

This sounds stupid but annoyingly true.

Casual dating is no longer weird to tinder generation

We can’t deny that millennials today are pushing back adulthood, like avoiding to settle down. There are many reasons behind this. Maybe because you are traveling, living abroad, running a business or you’re just not sure how the future holds. The casual dating seems to be a good solution.

Casual dating is all about the attention, no string attached, and sex. It is about being present and enjoying the moment. The tinder generation is super chill about this.

The generation of private detectives

Do you stalk your crush or Tinder match on Facebook? Yes me too.

When your date starts to tell you about his or her cute dog, you probably already know its breed and name by this time.

Stalking and prequalifying has become a big part of online dating. You are about to meet someone random so you need to make sure that this person is real.

Trust me, being catfished is sucks.

Just by having names and their locations, we can get full information on which university they graduated from, their workplaces, last concert they went to or even their favourite sports. Crazy, huh.

Women are in the spotlight

Without being affected by the tinder generation phenomenon, some people still want to meet their partners in an old-fashioned way. However, when we talk about the old-fashioned way, we talk about the times when many women did not have a lot of choices in meeting partners.

Millennials girls have more power in their love life

Lately, new dating apps that support women’s equal right in a relationship have changed the rules of the dating game. Bumble and The League are just two examples.

‘Life’s short, make the first move’

‘Be the CEO your parents always wanted you to marry’

Those are the two famous quotes that you might have seen in the tube station or buses as their advertising. Sorry for being too feminist for this one but damn I love their quotes. Bumble only allow women to make the first move.

The League app is known as an exclusive dating app. It is for women who are told that their standards are too high. Inspired by the equal gender issue that women are struggling to find partners that are willing to accept their career and success, The League only allows high-quality people to get in. A smart algorithm performs a screening test using your LinkedIn and Facebook information.

Tinder generation is real. It is changing the way millennials think about love. Casual dating doesn’t appeal to everyone, nor must it. There are still some amongst us who strive with finding their partners through an old-fashioned way and express those cliché feelings with flowers and chocolates, I salute you. And, to those who are on Tinder, Bumble or any kind of dating app – there’s no shame in your game. 

Good luck on finding love.

Author

Alifa is a marketing graduate and currently building a career in a global consulting firm. She loves to write about her life, passion and struggles of being a 20-something millennial. When she’s not writing, she enjoys beaches, ice coffee and binge-watching Scandal.

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